Oh yeah late post but I got into the SUniG team. Kinda regret not trying this last year when I was more free (compared to M2) though. Really made some personal breakthroughs with regards to my personal skills in all aspects - setting, receiving, and even spiking because of ivp training. Happy :))) On the bench once again but I'm a very happy bencher because the main team is really very good and I think they really deserve it!!!
Don't know whether to continue for IVP, especially with all the SEP ppl coming back. Let's see how it goes I guess. SUniG finals tonight, then pang gang lo no more training until idk when! Ascen(dance!) concert coming soon, much excites but guilty for missing 2 weeks of wed dance prac cos every wed got sunig match. Gonna pang gang from dance soon, after 15 Oct!!!! Thankfully also pang gang from IFG last week lo!!! Still dam anal that I couldn't make it for bball semis and finals cos got sunig match. Can't wait to pang gang from everything hahaha.
I can swear, I can joke I say what's on my mind If I drink, if I smoke I keep up with the guys And you'll see me holding up my middle finger to the world Fuck your ribbons and your pearls 'Cause I'm not just a pretty girl
I don't understand. I really don't. Sigh. You say it's definitely not because I'm incompetent but it's because you cannot trust me to work. But i always finish all work on time and of a good quality. You say it's the style. But to me it's the outcome that matters. You say to you it's the process. Well, I guess after thinking it through again by myself and talking about it to Minying, it really does make sense to work separately. I still feel dam shitty tho it's like I was cheated and I don't even know whether all the fun and laughter and good times we had together were real or not???? I'll still choose to believe they are real anyway and keep them as good memories. I feel that it's never gonna be the same again but I guess it doesn't matter to you. What does it matter to you? I'm just another person in your life you can have fun with and leave behind. It's pretty sad. It's really sad actually. Times like these make me feel so gullible and I feel like I got cheated T_T But I've always wanted only the best for you, because I thought that you deserve nothing less than that. I'm always showing care and concern for you but it's so difficult and I always get hurt when I do so. I was really feeling quite miserable as time passed by, esp end of m1 up till now. Why do I have to always subject my emotions and feelings to your mood (swings)? I do anyway, because I care for you. You're such a dear friend. But because you're so dear to me, you hurt me so much unintentionally although i know deep in your heart how much you care for me and how u always want nothing but the best for me. This is so difficult. It really is. It's so fucking sad and this whole situation hurts me so much but you say there's nothing I can do about it and it's not my fault. I just hope that this decision to separate our friendship from work and school will do us both good. I know nothing will ever be the same again but nevertheless I still hope that we can at least still have fun together occasionally like how we did in the past. "Do you still want to be my friend?" "I don't know, this friendship definitely's gonna take time to heal"
Fucking just kill me it's really so very sad it's even sadder than any fights/quarrels/HTHT I've ever had with any of my family/friends/ex/bf/basically whoever. How can you make me cry so much more than my bf does????????? You really mean a lot to me as a friend. Basically a very important human being in my life. I guess it's now time to detach these emotional heartstrings. I hope you'll be happier :')
As for me I'll work fucking hard on everything, be it studies, dance or volleyball. I'll become so so so capable that I won't feel condescended upon by you (even though you claim you think I'm capable). I'll live up to how competent you think I am. I really can and I will.
