I always think that I'll do so much better if I just put in that lil' bit more effort. But I always don't. It has been a long long time since my last productive day (months or years ago). Furthermore, I itchy hand and I STARTED TO WATCH KHUNTORIA'S WGM. Shit sia I'm watching 3-4 episodes a day someone save me T_T
Ok staph, nobody will help me unless I help myself. I'm tired, but who isn't? What gives me the right to say I'm tired (when I haven't even been doing anything much). Remember, dreams don't work unless you do. Will I be able to reach the future I envisaged? Let's work hard towards that answer.
Side note: At least I feel relatively happy because I always work and play (hard) at the same time. All I have to do is cut down (quite a bit) of my play time.
I have been thinking a alot. For the whole holidays. Ever since AB camp. It really got me thinking. About my future. A lot about my future. My life is going to become relatively fixed in about, 5 months? Once A level ends. That would determine my future - where I'm going. Or rather, where I CAN go. What direction is my life heading towards. Will I be flooded with euphoria? Will I reach my intended destination? What even is my destination?
People always tell you to dream big. "Reach for the moon, so even if you fall, you'll land among the stars." That's what they always say. That's actually a very lousy consolation statement. "Nobody ever remembers the second." That's that others say. The former, are self-delusional people while the latter, are pragmatic people. Or perhaps I describe them way too unfairly to the extremity. But still, aren't there only two types of people in the world - good or bad? If you don't do bad stuff, does that not make you good? But again, thinking from the other perspective, if you don't do good stuff, does that make you bad? Not really, if I might say. Actually all these depend on your defintion. Different people have different definitions for different terms.
Forget about MYCT. MYCT only serves as a wake up call for me. I'm very sure I didn't do well. It's not that I didnt study. I admit that I tried my best to study during the last week of June holidays. I thought I would at least do okay, but I totally screwed my exams, I didn't even perform to my standards, didn't bring out what I studied. C'mon, stupid mistakes like totally missing an entire page of a source, like, what even, hahaha. It's okay because this motivates me to step up my game. I will because I can!
